Citus experts: the biggest purchase without the biggest drama – how to choose your first home calmly and wisely

Odeta Šlyčkova, Head of Sales at the creative real estate project development and placemaking company Citus, encounters clients every day who want to buy a home but are afraid to start the process. She explains:

People are often difficult to persuade – even to come to a meeting – because they feel insecure or lack knowledge. They believe that in a meeting they will be on the weaker side, come under pressure or give in to emotions. In their view, this could lead to an irrational decision that would become a burden. However, a property sale must be a consultation, helping to align needs with possibilities.

Some people who are buying a home for the first time experience severe anxiety. Šlyčkova reveals how to turn this process into a success story rather than a stressful one.

Here, it is helpful to recall the idea of the ‘competence ladder’. Most buyers are in a state of conscious incompetence – they recognise that they ‘don’t know’. The aim is to move towards conscious competence, when the criteria are understood and a sense of safety is established. This path is usually blocked by three factors: fear of commitment (will I be able to pay?), information asymmetry (the seller knows more), and FOMO (fear of missing out – the fear of being too late to make a decision). Often, buyers are unsure of their safe financial limits, including not only the cost of the apartment itself but also the home’s monthly expenses. They are also uncertain about technical solutions, and the opinions of those around them – from parents to friends – frequently differ. Šlyčkova elaborates:

When the boundaries are undefined, emotions take the wheel. That’s why the first step should not be browsing listings – it should start with finances. Buying a home that hasn’t yet been built creates extreme anxiety. People are afraid to invest in something they cannot see and that does not yet exist. The most common mistake is being afraid of a conversation and therefore missing the chance to quickly gather information that could otherwise take weeks to search for online.

An additional source of anxiety is ‘decision paralysis’: the supply seems overwhelming, time is passing, the responsibility is heavy, so the decision keeps being postponed. Information gathering becomes an end in itself rather than leading to action. To escape this cycle, the buyer needs to set clear boundaries – financial, locational and quality-related – and stick to them. This way, decision-making becomes a process, rather than constant back-and-forth with changes of opinion.

Šlyčkova points out the first steps:

If you are planning to buy on credit, the first step should be to consult with the bank, rather than searching for advertisements or browsing projects. Calculate how much money you will have left after your mortgage payments and utility bills to feel comfortable.

Online loan calculators only provide approximate information. Consulting with a bank or credit specialist helps you determine your real options. This gives rise to a psychological budget – three safeguards:

· maximum housing budget,

· maximum monthly budget (payment plus regular operating costs),

initial deposit. Even if you fall in love with a beautiful terrace or floor-to ceiling windows during the viewing, the decision will then not exceed your safe financial zone.

When choosing a location, the most important factors are your daily routes, including trips to work, kindergarten or university, as well as public transport schedules, traffic patterns and access to green spaces. Add development plans (what is planned for the next 3–5 years, what the municipality announces, and new projects). Also, visit the location at different times of the day – in the morning, in the evening and on the weekend. This will quickly reveal whether the noise, smells and traffic meet your expectations. Šlyčkova adds: ‘Don’t be prejudiced – new projects often change the reputation of neighbourhoods. Evaluate the facts, not the stories: see for yourself and stay to experience the location’.

Innovative platforms facilitate decision-making. Šlyčkova recommends using Citify, CityNow or similar city development maps, which reveal detailed context about infrastructure, planned projects and district prospects, and help to organise mobility information.

Šlyčkova adds that the more meetings you attend, the more information you will gather and the more confident you will feel:

A meeting is the fastest way to reduce uncertainty. The seller’s goal is to provide the necessary knowledge so the buyer can focus on the essential issues and make a more intuitive decision. If the buyer wishes, a construction manager can attend the meeting to answer technical questions. Some details can only be provided in person, such as sound insulation schemes and likely delivery dates. This will definitely help reduce anxiety and expand your knowledge.

It is also worth relying on your senses: assess the noise, odours and ventilation, and natural light in various weather conditions. Write down all the answers – our memory likes to embellish.

There is a simple method to ensure that your decision is based on reason rather than gut feeling. Write down the five most important criteria, give the two most important one’s double weight, and then assign a score from 1 to 5 to each apartment you view.

Šlyčkova:

The first home is often a stopover, not a final destination. After all, we don’t buy a home once in a lifetime, but when we need it, and we choose according to the needs of that stage. This approach removes unnecessary drama and allows for a more rational choice.

It is always beneficial to take a break and ‘cool down’: a pause brings your attention back to the facts. Šlyčkova advises recognising the signs that indicate the need to pause: burnout from the amount and flow of information, confusion of projects in your memory, and unpleasant heated discussions about choices or a shift in your main priorities:

Give yourself more time to make the final decision. Gather all the information – check it, and compare it with alternatives. When you are left with two or three favourites, cool things down and apply the ‘exit test’ – which option would be easiest to rent or sell if your plans changed in 3–5 years? Or have a ‘pros and cons’ evening with people whose opinions matter to you. Then, sleep on the decision and return to your notes and scores in the morning. This will make your final decision calm and well-founded.

Another method recommended by Šlyčkova is to view the decision through the lens of investment. If you are overwhelmed by emotions and cannot come to a final decision, consider purchasing a home as an investment. Evaluate the house as if you wanted to rent it to yourself and then sell it at a higher price, profiting from the increase in value. It will help you consider your needs (which will determine the ‘rental’ price) and the rationality of your decision in terms of location, property quality and future liquidity. Šlyčkova underlines this:

It is also important to understand that a home is indeed an investment—it is your best business that can make you money. Lithuania is located in a region where real estate has historically maintained and increased in value. Choosing the right location and property can ensure not only a comfortable life, but also financial benefits in the future.

Some people, even after making a successful decision, experience ‘buyer’s remorse’ – they cannot shake the feeling that they could have made a better choice, that perhaps they did not evaluate all the options. This feeling of apprehension and fear arises very early on and is one of the primary barriers to the process: will I be competent and rational throughout the process, and will I make the best decision?

To avoid buyer’s remorse, Šlyčkova recommends writing down why this particular option was chosen, based on predetermined criteria. It is also essential to plan the next two weeks, which include submitting documents to the bank, making decisions and holding technical meetings. Šlyčkova categorically does not recommend continuing to browse ads – these only fuels doubts and thoughts of ‘maybe I should have done something differently’.

Summarising the advice given, a clear plan for a successful home purchase emerges:

1. Bank consultation: set three non-negotiable limits,

2. Location and context: check Citify, CityNow or similar apps,

3. Needs and top 5 matrix: what is necessary, what would be nice to have and what to avoid,

4. Meetings and questions: solutions, terms, guarantees; at least 4–6 visits, and write down your observations immediately,

5. 24-hour pause – decision: cooling down and ‘exit’ test.

Šlyčkova concludes:

You can control the entire home-buying process yourself; don’t let your emotions and fears do it for you. Undoubtedly, this is a very responsible and complex decision, but there is nothing about it that requires special powers.

A structured approach, homework and a desire to learn more help restore a sense of control, reduce fear and allow you to view the biggest purchase of your life as it deserves to be viewed – calmly and rationally. Knowledge and preparation are the best remedies for fear, helping to turn the purchase of your first home into a success story rather than a stressful one.